Shoemoney and John Chow's Illegitimate Evil Spawn

I am sure you all are wondering how cool it must be to be me.  Well, it is pretty cool.  Every time I visit these uber affiliate sites I see pictures of their sweet rides and big houses and big checks.  So, I figure, why should I withhold that from you?  So for today’s post, you get to see what it’s like to live in an MTV Crib.  Here is a shot of my sweet pad.

I am not trying to make you all jealous, I know it’s frickin sweet!  I had a rough night affiliate marketing last night that wiped me out.

After a long vacation (almost a year) I’ve decided to come back to give you more of what you want.  My two fathers took me on an amazing trip to Orlando for IZEAfest and then we flew to Vegas for BlogWorld.

At BlogWorld I was able to get the inspiration I needed to come back to my blog.  Let’s face it, after living off of my trust fund set up by my dad’s I think it’s time to get back to making boat loads of cash online.

To update my previous post, I have no officially smoked my dad in Google.  While he continues to drop, I continue to rise.  Check out the latest ranking for his own name!

Who is who’s daddy now John Chow!

Dear Dad,

I know how much you dislike Google and discredit the search engine traffic you receive.  We all know you only get 2% of your traffic from Google.  But for a struggling orphaned child like me, things of this nature are very important.

So I did a little search today on your name John Chow, and look who is right on your coat tails!  You only rank #49 for your own name, while I come in at #53.  A few more days and I will be more popular than you for your own name!

I have tried nicely to talk to you dad, but you continue to ignore me. So I went straight to the top and talked to YOUR daddy, Mr. Google. Google and I had a long heart to heart about how you were neglecting your child and deserved to be penalized. After a long discussion, it was noted that you already got Google Bitch Slapped in the search results a long time ago for your evil doings, so we needed to develop another plan.

That’s when we came up with the idea of taking away some of your pagerank. Consider this a warning! We will continue to dock you 2 pagerank points for every month you ignore me! Google is my real father, even if he isn’t my blood.

Who’s evil now?

This is a cry for help.

Seeing as how my dads John Chow and Shoemoney want to ignore me, I am having a difficult time finding pictures of myself growing up.  It seems they are hiding all of these photos to try and deny my existence.  I figured at some point in time some of you out there have taken some pictures.  so PLEASE, if you have any send them to me at chowmoney (at) chowmoney.com.

I would greatly appreciate it, and will happily post the pictures here on my blog with a link back to your site.  In the meantime, here is one I dug up from a couple of years ago.

Who do I get my good looks from?

Ok guys, you all must be familiar with my dads little RSS competition by now. It seems John Chow and Shoemoney both want to be the dad with the most new subscribers for the month of October.

Typical.

They always were more interested in their little marketing schemes than nurturing their child.  I mean, look at Shoemoney square dancing instead of being a good dad.

Well, I am here to change all that. Illegitimate children unite! For all of you out there that have been kicked to the wayside and underappreciated, I am here to declare war on my two dads! Let’s see how many people we can get subscribed to this blog to show the world that people like you and me deserve some respect!

How do we rise up?

Simple. Subscribe to this blog! Click that little link on the top right sidebar and add this blog to your RSS reader.

What’s in it for you?

You get to part of a revolution like none other. PLUS, one lucky subscriber will get a limited edition Chowmoney t-shirt! That’s right, be the envy of your neighborhood with this never before seen gem of a shirt. Subscribe now!

I like to see where my visitors are coming from so I did a little prying into Analytics this morning.

It looks like dear old dad #1 Shoemoney is visiting my site. Please don’t ignore me dad as I would like to talk to you about my family history.  Who else from Lincoln, NE could be coming here?

Dad #2, John Chow, I know you are watching as well. Vancouver is a place I would like to visit one day. I sure hope you will chime in and tell me that you love me. It is because of you I am so evil. I would love to share a $60 hamburger with (if you pick up the tab).

Love you both,
Chowmoney

Welcome to my blog!

I figured it was time to come out from the rock I have been living under all these years and expose to the world that John Chow and Shoemoney have created me, an evil marketing spawn. You can read all about me (and see a close up picture) if you are interested in my story!

Since I am a natural money maker, entrepreneur, affiliate marketer, programmer, writer, and hype artist by birth, writing this blog will be a great way for me to disseminate all of the knowledge that runs in my blood.

Why am I doing this?

That’s quite simple: to finally meet my dads! Well, that and to add some humor to your day. So help me out (as you can see from my picture I need it!) Press one of those social bookmarking thingie’s, send an email to your friends, and subscribe to my RSS feed! The whole world needs to know about Chowmoney!  And maybe John Chow and Shoemoney will admit to the world of my existence.